Real Talk “Natural or Nah”


When Is comes to the topic, as well as the act of “going natural” many people (men) aren’t too crazy about the idea of “the big chop”. Personally coming from a long line of thick, long,  curly, hair I couldn’t wait until I was old enough to get a relaxer. My whole life until seventh grade I’d worn my hair natural. I would daydream about how it felt to have STRAIGHT hair. I was in fact fascinated by the thought. So, finally when summer of 2012 came around my mom had decided we were both getting too old for the routine kicking and screaming when the time came to get my hair done. My thirteenth birthday was right around the corner, and i wanted noting else but to chemically straighten my hair and cut it off.

I was extremely shocked that my mom even came to me with the idea. She has always been the type of person who wants a child to look like a child relating to image which is another reason why as a child I never wore weaves. I was 12 the first time I sat in a salon chair. I felt so out of the norm. Almost foreign to a salon. No one except for my mom had ever washed my hair, or even comb through it. Mostly because it was too thick, but also because I’d never trusted anyone with my hair. For a very long time I felt that my hair was what defined me. I felt like no one knew who “Destiny” was until I showed up to school with a blow out. Now that my hair was straight I was what people thought to be pretty.

For whatever reason society feels that straight hair is more beautiful, and for a long time I did too. I liked it when people would ask me things like, “are you mixed?” or “is that your real hair?”. I found myself becoming more and more addicted to the flat iron/blow dryer. I was willing to have extreme split ends if it meant having “white girl hair”. The more compliments I got the more I turned up the heat, and the straighter my hair was. Eventually, my beautiful thick hair became dry, brittle, and would break off. My mom came to me and told me how she regretted letting me relax my hair, and I was in total agreement. I couldn’t believe that something that seemed so great that was suppose to make my life easier was now the reason my hair is  in the worst shape it’s ever been in.

Now that I’m older and I know what it’s like to have a relaxer, and what its like to have my natural hair I’d much rather deal with a few tangles rather than heat damage. I do wear weaves now, and many people feel as if it’s very artificial and fake, but a lot of women do it for convienence rather than opinions (even though a com)


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